SAHM's, Sweats and Ponytail Syndrome

I have been truly blessed to have the opportunity to be a stay at home mom (SAHM) and be with my children for the first few years of their lives. It is an honour to get to spend my days with them and teach and shape and mould them into the little people that they are becoming, but....there is a darker side to staying at home that many moms don't like to talk about.

Come on, you all know what I am talking about....the sweats, the ponytails and ball caps, the spit up on your shoulder that never seems to come out in the laundry....no wait, it did come out, that's a new stain!

It all boils down to putting all others above ourselves - but isn't that what we are supposed to do?!?! NO!!!

My favorite saying to tell my massage clients, especially those who are caregivers has always been "You can't give from a dry well!" Explaining to them that they were no good to anyone else if they didn't take time for themselves. A statement which I firmly believe with all of my heart! So slap the biggest hypocrit sign on my forehead that you can find!!!

I LET IT HAPPEN! I LET MYSELF GO!

It wasn't a conscious decision, it just happens. Baby is napping so you catch up on housework and laundry or you nap yourself. Baby is just gonna spit up on you anyway so why bother to put on good clothes? Why do your hair? It's only gonna get pulled on and tangled with baby food! Who's looking at you? You don't go anywhere anyway right?

A trip to get groceries is a HUGE event! I get to put on my jeans?!?!? No wait, they don't fit! ARGH! Back to the ever stretching waistband of my trusty friend the sweatpants!

The problem is.....baby grows up to be a toddler. Yes they are still as messy but it isn't directed at you nearly as much as it used to be. Then comes preschool and kindergarten and they are pretty independent little folks! Unfortunately no one copied your pontail and sweats on that email. You fell into a rut right? I sure did. I just didn't bother anymore. It wasn't worth the effort.

But as many SAHM's will tell you, this feeling grows and grows until you reach the point that it starts to affect your self esteem. You start to feel sloppy and lazy (even though you don't stop all day long). You don't care of you eat that bowl of ice cream, you won't feel it, the pants grow with you. And workout? Who has the energy got that? I know. It happened to me. I got down, I got depressed. (I now recognize that I even suffer from seasonal "blues". Being aware of such a thing makes me even more conscious to make the effort, to not lose myself in those baggy clothes anymore.)

How did I move past this? It wasn't rocket science just simply a promise. I promised to make some effort everyday, no matter how small to take care of myself; because only then can I take care of my family. For me, this means getting a workout in most days of the week; planning my meals (making them healthy and balanced); doing my hair and getting dressed in REAL clothes (even if it is just a pair of jeans and t-shirt) *Find a pair of jeans that fit you well, regardless of the size and ROCK THEM!!!.

You know, in reality, it doesn't take that much more energy and the payoff of feeling like a normal person again is so worth the effort! I might not leave my house to go to work a 9-5 job but I still take the time to put some energy into myself so I can take that energy and use it to give back to my family and friends.

The old saying "if momma ain't happy, no one's happy" is oh so true! So why not make yourself a promise to make momma happy! I promise you it'll be worth your time!

Health and Happiness,

Lesley