Is There Enough to go around?

My question is...is it human nature or learned behaviour....Why do people hate to see others happy? Successful? Confident?

Well after a lifetime of feeling "bullied" and "never good enough" I have come to realize that people believe that if you are happy, you are stealing from their happiness. If you are successful, that means less success for them. All good things in life sit in a big pot and there is only so much to go around. So you had better get what you can before someone else gets it! I don't know about you but even saying it that way gives me a bad feeling.

Then again, maybe I don't think like everyone else... In fact, I have often questioned my ability to be in business, partly because I do not believe in the "competition" aspect in many ways. Some people are very "hard core and ruthless" business men and women. After all there is only so much disposable income out there. But early on in my massage therapy career I came to believe that the more therapists there are, the better that is for the public. They might not all be coming to me but in the end, it's for the betterment of the community because it means more people are getting massage - which in the grand scheme of things boasts well for all therapists. I know this goes against conventional business wisdom but it is what I have come to believe. Since that time I have found this theory to prove true in other areas of my lfie as well.

Now don't get me wrong, I am not immune to it! There are still areas of my life where I feel insecure and funny enough these are the things that make me feel threatened the most. But I can now recognize that when I am not happy for someone else or their success, let's face it, it's jealousy on some level. Being able to identify the source of our feelings can give us a HUGE clue in working through them.

Let's look at an example....if we feel envious of someone else's sucess in their weight loss journey (just say yours is slow or maybe you haven't even started yet) we might criticize their efforts, talk about them behind their back, gossip about how they starve themselves or try to sabotage them by offering them unhealthy foods. How is that affecting the other person? Well it might upset them, make them sad and in some cases, depending on their level of security, they might quit. Or they might ignore it and continue to be successful, making you feel even worse about yourself and your journey.

But how does it affect you? The negative energy that you emmit in attempts to derail that person, just come back to you. The more you talk about them, the worse you feel about yourself, mayben ot imeediately or even consciously but it is true. Does it help you in your struggles with your weight? Does it make you feel better about eating foods that you know aren't healthy for you?

So why is it that we believe talking badly about others will help us feel better about ourselves? I believe it is learned behaviour. We are taught to compete at an early age. Our parents compare us with siblings and then classmates. We compete for seats in universities and colleges, we compete for jobs, we even compete for our significant others in many cases.

Well, you might think I am crazy all together but like I said, that isn't how I think at all. I think the more that you have and share, of your things and yourself, the more will come back to you. And if everyone gave more freely of themselves that all of that positive energy would be overwhelming and create HUGE changes in our world.

Let's get back to our weightloss example. So this time you are happy and supportive of your friend's success.

What have you lost by being happy for him/her?

What could you possibly gain? Hmm....a confidante, a partner in your own journey, tips and tricks for success, motivation - what worked for them might help you! If they are willing to share with you, then they benefit and so do you right? They gain even more self confidence by sharing what they have learned and you gain the benefit of their experience as well as their support, and support from someone who has already been successful counts for more than you might realize. To me that seems like a win-win situation?

Bottom line I think, is the next time that you have negative feelings towards someone or their situation or success, stop and question whether it might have something to do with what you feel they might be taking from you...is their happiness taking away from yours? Does their success meaning that you will fail? Or is your jealousy just confirmation that there is something in you that you want to change?

It's never about the other person!
So maybe instead of beating each other down and competing with each other we should try supporting and encouraging each other. I think we'd be in for a pleasant surprise.....

Health and happiness,
Lesley-Anne

What is healthy anyway?

Isn't freedom of choice incredible? When I was a little kid the cereal aisle in the grocery store was littered with colorful characters and even a dark dracula fellow then buried on the bottom shelf were some boring boxes of brown flakes and that oat stuff Mom used for making cookies. That vast array of choices from my hayday has NOTHING on what is available today. The cereal aisle now is probably triple the size that it used to be (along with the grocery store itself) providing us with a never ending supply of items to choose from. And it isn't just cereals. Coffee, cereal and granola bars, perfectly portioned controlled 100 calorie packs of "goodies", flavoured popcorn, flavoured water and powders to put in that water, more kinds of crackers than you ever thought possible...the variety is seemingly endless. Therein lies the problem. There is so much to choose from that we have NO idea what real food is anymore!

It isn't your fault that you are confused about nutrition, how could you not be?

They do an incredible job of convincing us that all of this junk they are feeding us is even good for us! So here I am to try and help you decifer some of the mess that the world has made of our food. And in all reality it is quite simple but with that said the industry has made it so complicated! It is there job to sell you their products. They don't care about your health. They don't care about your cholesterol or your type two diabetes. They care about their bottom line and how much you have to spend. And the one thing here that upsets me the most is that they target us as parents and in turn they get our children.

Our kids are being taught that 100 calorie packs of cookies are healthy! Yes, our school even claim to be healthy and these snacks meet the criteria of what they define as "healthy". But the first ingredient of almost every item on school canteen shelves is sugar. Yes these items are portion controlled (complete with their colorful lables saying only 100 cals) but when a child comes and buys 2 or 3 to go with their chocolate milk, I am sorry, it is NOT healthy!!! So to say that you are a healthy organization, be it school or otherwise, is irresponsible and a disservice to the children. You are teaching them that these items are "healthy" when in reality they are still just junk in disguise. And as parents we are so rushed and harried in our lives between work, houses, spouses, other committments (read over-commitments) that we accept what we are being told as the truth!

In the meantime don't think that my kids don't ever get to eat any junk, I am not the nutrition police but I am passionate about educating our children properly about nutrition and this is just misinformation and confusing - heck, it confuses us, it has to confuse them!

So what am I supposed to be eating anyway

This is my mother's favourite question and she isn't alone.....

Fin, foot, feather - if it once walked, crawled or swam you are good to go. Lean cuts of beef and pork, fish and poultry are all great staples to base a meal around. Not to mention the eggs from that poultry or dairy products from the cows. Just don't deep fry it or smother it in sauce (sugar) or gravies.

If it grew in the ground or on a tree or bush, go to town! Fruits, vegetables, and grains even - YES dare I say it, the dreaded carbohydrates!!!

That pretty well leaves you to the perimeter of that ginormous store that we call a supermarket with the exception of maybe a few staple grains like rice, oats or quinoa (keen-wah) found in the dry goods aisle.

If man had a hand in making it or it has more than a few ingredients, any of which you can't pronouce,put it back and walk away!

Step away from the shelf and high-tail it back to the produce section where you can be relatively safe.

In the "fitness" world, they call this clean eating. it is quickly becoming a phenomenon although it has been around for years. But in all honesty the food itself or knowing what to eat exactly isn't the real issue. The real issue is convenience. We like tasty, quick, easy to grab and go snacks and meals (otherwise the drive thru never would have been invented). We don't sit to share a meal with our family any more, let alone prepare our meals together.

But a piece of fruit (nature's candy) sure seems convenient to me....nature made portion control. Grab a banana and a handful of nuts or an apple and a piece of cheese and you have a perfectly balanced snack! What's more convenient than that!

Oh and speaking of convenient, what about oven timers and slow cookers? How about taking half of your television time (or even commercial breaks from Big Brother or Bachelor Pad) and prepping your meals for the next day. Pop it in the oven or set your crockpot up on the way to work in the morning and come home to a hot, fresh meal with real food!

The bottom line is getting back to basics. Eating real, nature made foods, cooking them ourselves and planning ahead (see previous post about meal planning and prep).

Their bottom line is the bank, yours is your health and wellness that maybe even more importantly that of our children! Let us be an example to them, they learn more from what we do than what we say!

Why bother...No one will listen anyway

Back in the not so distant future, I was told by a very dear "friend" that it would be useless for me to persue my personal trainer certification while here in this small town where I currently reside. She did not believe that I would be able to put it to good use. In her opinion my opinion and ideas wouldn't hold any weight (pardon the pun) around here. When I questioned her on exactly why she thought so, she told me it was because I was "never fat".

So for starters I depise the "F" word. I do not use it in my home or around my children especially. The only thing my children know about fat (from my teaching anyway) is Fat as a macronutrient (along with carbohydrates and protein). And yes there is good fat...that's a whole other subject all together....


So back to my "friend"...she was partly right, I have never been overweight by medical standards but certainly by society's. I have never had to shop in a plus size store or section of a store. And although I spent most of my youth being teased and bullied, it was never about my weight.


BUT...with that said, despite the fact that I was never "the f-word" I was unhealthy and terribly out of shape. In fact it is a road that I too still travel today. You see, knowing and not doing is the same as not knowing....and I knew for a long time but there was a lot of that time that I did not practice that I preached and even what I deep down believe in the deepest depths of my heart. I was eating lots of unhealthy food (in addition to the good stuff), I was not exercising and challenging my body on a consistent basis and my thinking was sabotaging my efforts with contaminated negative thought processes.

I believe in the power of healthy eating (lots of good, natural healthy food).

I believe in the power of being active and moving my body that I have been blessed with as fully functioning.

I believe in the power of healthy, positive thinking! (this is a HUGE one). It is our thoughts that create our feelings and those thoughts and feelings have immense control over our successes and failures as well as the way we show up in the world!


So my business which is in the developing/expanding phase right now is about Healthy Balance and just what that balance is for you might be different for what it is for me. I may need to focus more on my emotional or spiritual development while you might need to work on your physical health or vice versa.


Bottom line is that while we are all travelling this road, we are all at different points along the way. In the end, we are all the same. We are all spirits in a physical body and those bodies look and act differently. But we can help each other, we can uplift and encourage each other - we can support each other and that is what I am all about. It isn't about being skinny, it's about being healthy, and I mean ALL AROUND health, all aspects.


I am on my way to developing my emotional, spiritual and physical body and it is my intention to share all that I can with you along the way. If there is any way that I can support and encourage you please do not hesitate to ask....I might just ask the same of you!



So be kind to not only those around you but be kind and gentle with yourself! Do not focus on the things that you are not or have not been but focus on what you are and have and how far you have come! Do not look at the 3 things that you didn't cross off of that to do list today but the 7 things that you did do! Each day is a process, be kind with yourself and gentle; that spirit of yours is fragile (even if we don't liek to admit it) and you are your own worst critic!

I bet you don't look at others and judge them the way that you judge yourself?!?! If I was a gambling woman, I'd put money on it!
Health and Happiness

Lesley

Who am I anyway?

Ok, time to get honest here. I want to share this with you all so you know just where I am coming from and why I am so passionate about health in general. I will try to give the reader's digest, condensed version.


Born and raised in Mt. Pearl, Newfoundland, with one older sister.
Never active, never played any sports - it was all music all the time.

Never was really big per se but couldn't run the length of myself. I was not in any way, shape or form an athlete, lol.

Always had an interest in natural health care after my other got sick when I was small. Her "sickness" was due to her very unhealthy lifestyle habits and as a result it had a HUGE impact on our family. I was particularly interested in nutrition (what can I say, I LOVE FOOD!)

When I didnt get accepted to university music school I went that fall anyway hoping to audition again the following year while getting some courses out of the way. One big problem about 2 weeks in...I HATED university!! I mean I despised it! I knew immediately that I was not going back in the winter. So what to do?

I found out that a private college in my town offers massage therapy! Great a course in natural health. I always held a firm belief that "stress will always manifest physically somehow" - a belief that I still hold today. So I completed my 2 year intense program and a short time after passing my board exams began practicing.

Problem arises....I have never LOVED practicing massage. I mean, I enjoy it sometimes, it is ok, but not my passion. Mainly becasue my work became about lawyers and insurance - not about the whole person, the holistic approach that I believed in. ...that balancing all aspects of the being so to speak.


In the meantime, I met now Hubby, started working out consistently weight training (which I had never done on a regular basis), got married, had 2 beautiful kids, moved like 6 times and here I am!

Back 2 years ago now, I competed in a figure competition. I loved the process and someday will probably do it again. In fact I had started this year thinking that I would do it again this fall but I fooled myself into thinking that I could so it and still remian balanced in my nutrtion and my mindset. I get way too obsessed too easily. So I am holding off now and working on regaining the balance that I had found.

You see, after I competed the first time I had some pretty crazy food issues. The day that I wouldnt eat an apple because it had too many carbs I knew I had a problem! And so began my struggle to regain my sense of self and self esteem. I royally screwed up my metabolism too in the process by the way.

So now I am coming clean.....
- I feel like a fraud! I am educated but am not the perfect living example of how it's done, but I am an example of a work in progress, finding what works for you and not giving up!

- I eat well most of the time but I am a sugar addict...that I fight with everyday! Fruit is nature's candy.

- I don't love working out but I love how it makes me feel AFTER! And I do it for my health.

- I am NOT an athlete in any way shape or form (that has not changed) and I am not in great shape - YET!

- I am terrible at pushups but I try so hard - I will do 50 someday before I die!

- It is my ultimate goal to someday do a pullup/chinup all by myself

- After years of wanting to complete my personal trainer certification I DID IT!!! With plans for more courses to come....and with that certification I want to bring my idea of how to balance exercise, health and fitness with real life, to you.


I believe in getting it done, so we can get on with our lives. But I also am passionate about the value of fitness and good nutrition and the impact that it can have in the long term on our health. Ultimately you HAVE to find something that you enjoy or you won't do it! It should still be fun, even if it has a serious purpose.
So now on to the Bootcamp classes that I am now offering! ..... I have compiled these workouts to get a great workout in under an hour, 3 times a week. A workout that anyone can do, anywhere, with no equipment but your own bodyweight. They will challenge you to push you out of your comfort zone and challenge yourself to do better each time. Only you will know. Only you can push you. But the group can help support you in your journey...just as you will support me in mine.
Mine is a journey to find my inner athlete, to push myself and to find balance.
Where is your journey taking you? What are your goals? What is your story?

So I was grocery shopping the other day.....

Tuesday is my normal grocery day. It's when produce is the freshest it seems and the shelves are fully stocked. As I wandered through the store today I took note of a few of the other shoppers, women mostly and the same look I had on my face that they had on theirs. What to eat? Breakfast, lunch, supper, snacks, school lunches, recess....is eating all that we do?!?!?


We all struggle with knowing what to get to eat, and then shopping for preparing the meals! No one with a life (home, family, spouse, job...) is immune from this seemingly mundane and never ending task. But there is a way to make it all just a little bit easier. It takes a little effort once a week but in the end saves time, money and a lot of frustration.


Planning! That's it. It is simple. Make a chart or graph of some kind. And plan all of your meals and snacks for the week. Yes I am serious! Plan leftovers for lunches the following day. Now you don't always to get so specific but the more detailed the easier it is all the same. You could say monday afternoons snack will be fruit without saying 1/2 cup of peaches if you know what I mean.

But if you take the time to plan all of your meals and spend a little time after shopping to prep your fruits and veggies if need be then it will save you a lot of time during the week as well as make your grocery shopping easier too. You will have a pre-made list!

If you are not all that hung up on planning the week or two or three then the other option is to create a list of breakfasts, lunches and suppers, and snacks too that you can glance at and choose from.

We all tend to cook the same things the same way all the time and we forget about things that we used to make a few months back or even a few years ago. Also commit to trying one new recipe a week. There are hundreds of thousands of healthy cooking websites with great and simple recipe ideas. In fact Kraft is one of my faves! Simple ingredients that we can even get HERE!


This is a sample day on my meal plan:

Breakfast: oats, blueberries, flax seed; one egg plus 2 whites

Snack: fruit

Lunch: Leftovers from last nights supper or maybe a sandwich or wrap

Snack: yogurt and almonds

Supper: Salmon, brown rice, veggies

Snack: fruit (nature's candy! Especially good in the evening to curb sugar cravings)



Always cook extra! Extra meat, chicken or fish can be used in wraps, in salads or on sandwiches or just have the same meal over again if you don't mind.


Remember, you are what you eat. When it comes to eating "healthy"...quality is more important than quantity. Is most cases you can eat MORE and still consume less calories. As one camper pointed out, learning to love good clean healthy food can take some time but in the end, HOW YOU FEEL will prove to you that it is worthwhile (aside from the scale).


In the meantime, I will be posting some of my favourite recipes in upcoming posts. You are more than welcome to include yours too in fact I'm begging you to!! I run out of ideas sometimes myself.....
 
Oh and one more thing...when you plan your week be sure to include a few meals/snacks to break the rules a little. If you deprive yourself of your favourite foods (even the not so healthy ones) you are setting yourself up to fail! And isn't the whole point of this to set up for success?

Welcome!

Welcome to my blog! Thanks for stopping by! Here I will share my thoughts, tips, questions, advice, inspiration and motivation as well as probably a few questions along the way. Join me as I work to help discover my own definition of balance and hopefully help you find yours!

In today's society we struggle each and every day with family, kids, spouses, home, work, social commitments, volunteering, self esteem and self image, financial issues, health, fitness, nutrition, stress, stress and often more stress.....the list is endless! How do you find a way to balance it all to ensure your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health? Well that's where I come in, it is my passion to help you do just that, as I live it and work on it myself. You see, as much I have read and studied this stuff, I find my balance shifting each and every day - and so it life. We all need to learn strategies to keep ourselves on an even keel.

Each and every one of us is out of balance in one area or another that's for sure! My imbalance might be physical while yours might be more spiritual or even vocational, and it changes often. No matter where the trouble lies, there is a way to restore optimal health and wellness in our lives. It is my goal to share with you some of my tips to do just that. Will you join me and also walk your own path as we discover our definition of balance?